In my experience, one of the worst things about being bullied is my internal voice saying “you’re over-reacting, it is no big deal, she isn’t being that mean.” That internal voice is wrong. If you are feeling bullied then the situation is not OK. Sometimes you should tell the person that you don’t appreciate the way she makes you feel if it is safe to do so. Maybe she doesn’t know what she is doing.

But it is likely that she does and that nothing you say will make her change. It is not your obligation to make her change.

Then we have situations like what is happening to females in the gaming industry. They are receiving real life death threats because they talk about what they believe. Sending someone death threats because you disagree with them does nothing to further your cause. Calling someone names does nothing to further your cause. No matter how worthy the cause those tactics will not spread ideas or change minds.

I don’t know how to help Brianna Wu, Anita Sarkeesian, and Zoe Quinn. I wish I did just as many other people wish they did. I’m going to start by openly saying “that is not OK.”